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January 2023: The knight of the Midterm đŸ€ș⚔

Your girls take midterms?

Of course they do!

They might need some help refining their study strategy, organizing their week, and loosening up on test day. But they’re just like every other kid on midterm week —  mostly prepared, slightly jittery, and more than a little eager to prove their salt. 

So, how do we get them from queasy to confident?

First, we bust some myths:

1. “Tests these days are made for geniuses. Unless I have a photographic memory I’m gonna fail.”

Studying has nothing to do with mindless memorizing and everything to do with strategic planning. 

Strategic planning = a successful performance. 

Weeks in advance we move into action. 

đŸ’„Our speech therapists, led by Mrs. Penina Kaufman, SLP model hands-on strategies and time management techniques in study skills workshops, that prep our girls to pace, plan and perfect their game plan. 

đŸ’„Co-teachers and counseling staff create personalized study plans for each student that map their study time day by day. 

đŸ’„ And teachers create in-depth reviews, outlines, and cram sheets, that help our girls master the material with ease. 

2. “As long as you have the notes, and memorize them until you’re blue in the face, you’re good. “

  Yeah, maybe if you’re Einstein. 

We believe in active reading and learning. It’s research-based and it works.

Our girls learn how to deep dive into their info, go through 1st, 2nd, and 3rd reads like a pro, ask pointed questions during reviews, and create associations and flashcards that actually stick. Boots on the ground. 

They could teach mainstream kids a thing or two about surviving midterm muddle. 

3. “Midterms is a school headache. Not a mom and dad problem.”

Not quite. 

The home-school partnership is a huge piece in your daughter’s success. 

Moms and dads, you can support your daughter by encouraging 1st, 2nd, and 3rd reads and keeping tabs on her midterm schedule. A reassuring note or little treat goes a long way in showing her you care. 

The rest is just positive thinking, a good night’s rest, and siyatta d’Shmaya. 

And thus we win the battles — and the war. 

Good luck to us all!

January hasn’t been all study and sweat. 

This month, we were delighted to learn that we have some super-talented young ladies in our midst. 

Dancers, singers, and actresses in both the 9th and 12th grades starred in YOB’s riveting musical about Communist Russia, while Gur’s Expo Illuminated run by the talented Mrs. Rochel Rosenwald, featured a stunning manifestation of the four galiyos, presented in true-to-life exhibits and breathtaking performances.  

Dr. Tamara Perlman delivered yet another powerful workshop to our speech and counseling staff. Her talk,  “How to Identify Telltale Signs of Trauma in School,”  explored the impact Big T’s and Little T’s have on a child’s psyche and how to treat signs of life in seemingly “dead” limbs and lives. 

This month’s Feature Teacher applauded a brand new teacher, Mrs. Sara Toby Silver. Mrs. Silver melded right into the pace and style of Ichud HS as if she had been with us for years. From the start, Mrs. Silver captured both the love and respect of her students. The girls feel accountable in her class but are also drawn to her warmth and ease. 

Case in point. Last week a few students approached me to discuss adding a weekly Parsha class (as an aside — aren’t our girls amazing?) As I was mulling over some ideas in my head and thinking who I can ask to take this on, they quickly suggested Mrs. Silver! That alone spoke volumes. 

When our students (and children) want more of us in their lives, we know we’re doing something right. 

It’s our running theme, but I’ll say it again: Be there for her. 

All the best, 

Mrs. Malky Bergstein

P.S. The ADHD Symposium, with lectures from David Becker, LCSW, ranks high on our February to-do list. As do our ice skating, snow tubing, and Panama trips! Looking forward!

December 2022: Winter magic, Ichud style

A fashionably dim hall draped in gold and black
a magnificent balloon arch welcoming each guest
..personalized gifts gracing every seat
waiters bearing groaning platters of hors d’oeuvres. 

No, not heaven. 

Just our annual ✹Chanukah Staff Gala,✹ honoring one of the most exceptional groups of educators I’m proud to call my team. 

Join me in applauding the chain reactions that begin with our teachers and therapists in the classrooms, and reverberate with resounding familiarity throughout our students’ futures. 

When an Ichud graduate receives empathy and empowerment in our program and establishes a non-profit to help disadvantaged girls in our community — that’s a chain reaction.

When an Ichud graduate reaches out to a staff member for advice on how to deal with a suffering friend — that’s a chain reaction.

When an Ichud graduate appreciates the growth she made in our program and wants to pay it forward and become a social worker or a special ed teacher — that’s a chain reaction.

Remember, it all starts with ♄ our ♄ belief in them. 

I specifically chose to honor Rivka Lamm, MSW, as this month’s Feature Teacher, at our Chain Reaction Chanukah Celebration, because Rivka so personifies this approach in her unfailing belief in each student. 

A therapist without borders (or burnt-out batteries!), Rivka gives our girls the best of her boundless energy and enthusiasm and authentic, relatable self. Our students feel her belief in them, and can’t help but live up to her expectations. We are so grateful to have her on our team. 

Speaking about beliefs and the messages we feed ourselves, we were lucky to have Sashi Fridman, a holistic healer specializing in the EFT method, ‘tap’ us into shedding our negative beliefs and meeting the best versions of ourselves. And if you were really lucky you even got your palm and personality read by her!

To top the event off, our staff was treated to the very first unveiling of Ichud’s spanking new website. 

Project managed by the talented Chaya Daniela Bronshteyn of BeholdCopy, this masterpiece tells the world in no uncertain terms, “Your daughter is stronger than her challenges. At Ichud she’ll prove it.“

It’s a standing ovation to our 20+ years of creating confident and competent classroom learners. 

If you haven’t seen it yet, hop over to meet our heroines. 

If December wasn’t busy enough, wait until you hear about our Senior Shabbaton in Pomona! 

An awesome mix of inspiration and recreation, the girls had the Shabbos of their lives! 

Swimming, bowling, singing, challah baking, glow-in-the-dark golfing, and hair and makeup styling, not to mention Mikes Burger’s, Palisades Mall, photo shoots, board games, panels, and Senior speeches! PHEW! 

The highlight of the weekend, hands down, was the challah baking and hafrashas challah. Mrs. Jaroslowitz infused the mitzva and the moment with such other-worldliness it was impossible not to be moved.

A wonderful time was had by all. The girls thrive with this kind of quality time, and we love to give it to them!

And one more simcha!

This month, Ichud hosted a beautiful sheva brachos for graduate Tamar Vanderbilt. We were zoche to be addressed by Rabbi Dishon and Rabbi Mandel, and the simcha was enhanced by the participation of staff members and teachers.

It’s been a winter whirlwind, but I wouldn’t want it any other way!

November 2022: Of coffee lounges, courthouses, and knitting classes ☕

The rest of the hemisphere may be hibernating, but here at Ichud, we’re just warming up!  

Check out what’s been brewing ➡

~PROVIDERS EXPO~

At the Special Education Providers Expo this month, Ichud was proud to be the sponsor of the Coffee Lounge. 

Our motto for this event, “Nurturing Children, Nourishing Minds Since 1999,” was emblazoned across the scrumptious buffet, highlighting the way our program stands up to the plate, again and again.  

Stands up and stands out. 

Ichud’s one-of-a-kind semi-inclusion model has been the envy of Brooklyn’s special education community for decades now, and the Expo was an opportunity for our educators to provide much-appreciated direction to new schools in the field. 

(Besides, anything that involves lots of fooding and schmoozing is a no-brainer for us.)

~TRIP TO THE COURTHOUSE~

I’m a huge believer in giving our students the best of experiential learning.   

Lucky for our students, this includes fun and educational field trips. 

In one of our most fascinating school trips, our students were personally invited to meet the Honorable Judge Ruchie Freier at her bench in the Brooklyn Courthouse. 

Judge Freier made history as Brooklyn’s first Chassidic female civil court judge and the girls were delighted to observe her in session, hear her riveting story, and enjoy a tour of her chambers. 

Not only did the bench trial supplement the U.S. government course curriculum beautifully, and give our girls a whole new dimension in understanding law and justice, it was an incredible privilege to meet with a frum woman who serves as an ambassador of justice. 

But the real reason I work months to secure this visit?

I’d like to hope that when our girls struggle with their own trials, they’ll recall this petite, bewigged judge, who despite the nudniks and naysayers, triumphed to the finish line and became a paragon of perseverance for women and girls the world over. 

~KNITTING CLASS IN THE SPOTLIGHT~

Knitting ain’t for little ol’ grannies anymore. 

Especially when you have an awesome teacher like Mrs. Mimi Srulowitz heading the show. 

Observing Mrs. Srulowitz artfully leading calm, productive knitting sessions is a powerful lesson in respecting our students where they’re at.

A fountain of patience and positivity, she gives each girl that special feeling, “You can and you count!” Each girl enjoys over-the-shoulder instruction at her own pace, at her own skill level. Talk about differentiating instruction!

The girls were thrilled to interview Mrs. Srulowitz for this month’s Feature Teacher column. They did such a fantastic job — makes me jealous I haven’t taken up knitting yet!

Thanks for wrapping up a wonderful November with me. 

September 2022: One word you never want to use on a teen đŸ€«

“Gotcha!”

Seriously. 

Because you really don’t want to catch your teen with her hand in the cookie jar. (Or in the fridge, or with the car keys, or on her phone during class.)

Not if you value your relationship with her.  

A better idea: Catch her being GOOD. Accept and love her even when she’s not. And let her know you expect greater and better. 

This year’s Ichud Girls High School Teachers Orientation on September 6th featured a talk by Dr. Tamara Perlman, PsyD so riveting, it nearly upstaged the cheesecake and hot breakfast buffet. 

Dr. Perlman is a renowned clinical psychologist with years of experience under her belt, specializing in trauma in adolescents. In her warm and captivating style, she focused on the far-reaching effects empowering teacher relationships have on struggling students. 

Her years of clinical work have proven what many have suspected all along: after Mom, Teacher is the number one go-to person in a teen’s life.  

Simple measures of showing up, spending time, and acknowledging their struggles and efforts as unique G-dly beings, protect our teens from the default messages their brains are wired to play: “I’m stupid,” “Nothing I do makes a difference,” or “What’s the point anyway?”

The goal is to celebrate them where they’re at.

  • When you say: “You took notes in class today! Not easy with a Regent subject,” She thinks, “I’m a capable person.”
  • When you say: “You made it to class within five minutes of the bell!!! Woohoo!”  She thinks, “I’m a competent person.”
  • “When you say “You davened Mincha every day this week!?! Those tefillos will rock the heavens!” She thinks, “I’m a connected person.”

And it’s this belief, this self-perception that imprints on her soul and psyche, reshaping her reality, and creating promise and purpose in her young life.  

⚠ Hold it right there, Mrs. Bergstein! ⚠

Are you suggesting that I turn a blind eye and pretend my daughter or student is a faultless angel who can do no wrong? Where’s accountability? Where’s responsibility?

No, I’m not. 

Because if you never expect more from your teen, you won’t get more. 

Dr. Perlman explained that all leadership is in conflict between acceptance and expectation. A parent or teacher is the quintessential tightrope walker, the ultimate purveyor of symmetry in a child’s life. 

In the word “emes,” spelled aleph mem taf, the aleph symbolizes the emunah, the unconditional love in the relationship. At the opposite end of the word, the taf represents the Torah, the rules and regulations we are expected to follow. 

And in the middle is the mem, the mother or Morah, who constantly pulls between both, creating the right balance and finding the right tension point that will communicate both acceptance and expectation. 

Staying in that space is what generates greatness and growth for our girls. 

Takes your breath away, no? I thought so too. Keep that thought warm. 

To cap off a superb event, my team and I released a reward system that changes how we at Ichud look at student struggles — specifically with attendance and class preparation. 

All the right elements are there: acceptance, expectation, and student-driven accountability. 

Watch the Present, Positive, and Prepared Program video:

You can take your hand out of the cookie jar now. 

We’re not looking. 🙈

Introducing Ichud Inspo

You’re here!

Hold on, we’ve got to celebrate this. 

Here at Ichud, where education is as individual as teenagehood, we’re always celebrating. The good, the bad, and the fabulous. 

So we decided to make it official and share it with you.đŸ„‚ 

Introducing Ichud Inspo: News, views, and good ol’ schmooze for Ichud parents and teachers. 

We’re here to cheer each other on with strategies that work, stories that inspire, and solutions that make a difference. 

Raising children with learning disabilities is an exhilarating and exhausting enterprise — one that has created unwitting experts out of us all. And we’re not planning on keeping any of our hard-won knowledge to ourselves. (Yeah, we’re nice like that.)

Like we say in the classroom, let’s do a think, pair, and share. You care to know, we care to show. 

Check this space for monthly support, surprises, and frame-worthy successes. 

Let’s make this year as awesome as the kid in your life.

P.S. This series is inspired by you. We’ve got lots to share, but we want to know the kind of material you’d love to see. Reply here to give us the lowdown. Looking forward! 😊

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